Gin and Catatonic
by Ker-rin
Summary: The fight w/ Voldemort is over-or appears to be so,until a frightening rumor spreads that Voldemort could be hiding in anyone in Ginny's ravaged world. W/ an insane Hermione to care for, her only surviving brother George always running off,& 2 mysterious


It was over. This was a phrase Ginny Weasley never thought she would hear. The sound of it on her lips did not seem right. The phrase did not meet with the indefinite knowledge that the war between the White and the Dark would never end. It was not meant to end but to continue on forever. Yet now it was over. Unclear to most who had won and who had lost. They had all lost, really. Blood Lines from great families were forever cut off. Never to continue.   
  
Ginny was one of the lucky ones, if they could be called that. It was really the dead ones that were lucky for they were not forced to pick up the pieces, to try and go on living.   
  
The ministry had erected a monument in the dead's honor, but Ginny and the others would spit at it. They were the ones who deserved the monument. Not those dead fools, who had fought for mere day, mere weeks, mere life times against the cause. No, it was people like her, sweet little Ginny, who deserved their plaques. It was the kind people who had seen so much, and been forced to live with it. Just living with it made them heroes....  
  
Ginny and the others had done more than fight for a lifetime. They had lost any chance of having real lives.   
  
Ginny never thought it would end up this way. She had imagined herself married by now. To whom she did not know, Harry perhaps? But that was as false a reality as there was. Harry was dead. Not dead and buried, exactly, but as good as dead. No one had ever found his body.   
  
Hermione too, was as good as dead. Mentally. Insanity had over washed her.   
  
She had always been one of the weaker ones.   
  
Ginny pitied them very little. She only pitied herself. The world revolved around her. Like it was a TV show, a movie, maybe even a book.   
  
Ginny's brothers were dead, save George, who was still normal. She hated him too, but at least he didn't have his name on that damn monument.   
  
Her brother's were all considered heroes. They had died for the cause. She and George had lived. They were not praised. They were not heroes.   
  
She had a meeting to go to that night. She had little idea what it was or what it's purpose was but she knew that she had to go. sighing her hand stroked her velvety purse, tiny rips in the fabric brushing her hand. She snipped it open, hearing the satisfying click of the lock, and then she pulled out her appointment book. Her eyes took in very little information, though she stared at it for a while. They weren't processing in her brain. Little did, those days.   
  
***   
  
Hermione Granger was a very smart girl. Even in her insane state she was intelligent. Little had changed of Hermione during the war. She'd just seen too much and reacted accordingly.   
  
They think I'm stupid, they do. They think I'm insane. But it's not that. It's like the words won't come out when I say them. I try to say I'm Not Insane Mr. Doctor. Mr. Doctor you're giving me too much sedative. I read once that you can only give four CCs of Bearwood to a patient under intense trauma. But see the words don't come out. They come out all slurred, from my sedative, I guess. Sometimes I wonder if maybe I have Goosebumps on my tongue. I have them everywhere else. I read they're from the cold. It's really hot in here though.   
  
Sometimes I have visitors. Ron visited yesterday. He comes in and he says "Hello Hermione." In this real deep voice, much deeper than I remember it, so then I try real hard to make the words right and I say "Hi Ron." So my voice sounds real cute and girlish cause I figure he'll like that not just some brainiac voice like I use to have. But then he gets all mad like and starts yelling about how he's not Ron and I just laugh and say yeah Ron you such a practical joker and then he looks at me and his face gets all soft and then after awhile he laughs too and I smile.   
  
Today I tried to tell my doctor there were Goosebumps on my tongue but it don't come out right so then I yell it and yell it and finally it comes out all slurred I keep yelling and then the doctor comes in a give me 40 CCs of Bearwood and I try to tell him how that's too much...   
  
  
***   
  
Ginny was sick of these damn ministry meetings. Bloody excuses to get the psychos some help so they could manufacture all the goodies the ministry needed some mindless drones to make. They had a wide selection to choose from. Not alot of people were totally with it, except maybe George but he just wasted his life these days sneaking off somewhere all the time.   
  
Ginny walked into the meeting room and yawned, she was so tired, even when she took off from work and slept and slept. She sat between Colin Creevy and an empty seat. She would have preferred to carry on conversation with the chair.   
  
"Hello Ginny." Colin said cheerfully, despite the pain in his eyes. Ginny examined him carefully and decided he was handsome, his chubbiness had evened out with his height and he had a rather atheletic build. As a matter of fact, he looked completely unlike the old Colin. He'd had shown his ID twice before she believed it was him. He was gorgeous, charismatic almost, but there was something deeper in him. Something to Colin that had never been there before. Still, Ginny was not interested in him but rather in his mysterious neighbor. Unlike the majority of the room, this man was a stranger to Ginny, obviously not a Hogwarts alumni.   
  
Ginny squinted at the handsome stranger, his nose was a small nub almost feminine. His eyes were almost too close together giving him an almost angry look. Yet his wide mouth was stretched into a large grin, taking up the bottom of his face entirely. He was rather handsome execpt he had cold ice eyes that didn't seem to have much of a pupil.   
  
"Whose your friend?" She asked, keeping her voice steady with its usual boredom. Still she was attracted to him, maybe because his ruffled dark brown hair resembled that of Harry's, except slightly lighter. It looked as if he'd seen too much sun, his hair probably orignally black and his face probably much paler. The sides of his eyes wrinkled as if he'd laughed a bit too much in his life but contradictory were the bags under his eyes that showed he had seen too much. He was quite a paradox and Ginny was naturally infautatied with him.   
  
Him?" Said Colin, his face stretching into a broad false grin, "He is my step sister's cousin, Will, he's visting from Australia." Ginny nodded not paying much attention to Colin's words but instead eyes focused in on this mysterious stranger with the handsome sun-kissed face. He turned and looked at her, catching her glare before she could avert her eyes. She smiled and Ginny's long inactive heart gave a jump.   
  
The sublime moment soon found itself interrupted and Ginny's head flew up to the sound of a boring drawl. It was the ministry of magic, a young man not much older then herself. He was a dreadfully boring man, his voice a high pitched squeak.   
  
"We are here to let ourselves heal from the wounds of the war." His voice dragged.   
  
"Let me guess, he's gonna pour peroxide on our heads, put a little salt on any emotinal wounds we might have, and then hand us some barbie band-aids?" Ginny said with a bitter smile, and Will and Colin laughed slightly into their hands.   
  
"We are going to team up." his dull monotone went on. "We are to partner up and confess our sorrows." Ginny ignored the chance for a sarcastic comment and shot her gaze towards Will.   
  
She wasn't the only one. A pretty blond girl, a hufflepuff, she thought, went up to him and he nodded in agreement. Colin too, not to Ginny's suprise, managed to attract the most beautiful Ravenclaw there.   
  
Ginny sighed, realizing she was going to be stuck with some reject. Good to be among one of her own, she thought. As she supposed no offers came to her. It was not that she was not beautiful though. Her hair had darkened to a luscious auburn and her green-blue eyes framed a beautiful face. Her freckles, once a prominent feauture on her face, had now faded down to trace beauty marks. Still, people seemed scared of her. it was the look in her eyes, she supposed. Sometimes they turned this crazy green, just as Harry's would. No, Ginny was not the type the boys flocked too.   
  
Yet Ginny ended up totally shocked. A handsome blond man came up to her just before they were about to begin, a slight grimace on his face. "Just you and me, huh?"   
  
The voice was familiar, yet it seemed changed as did the person himself. The war had changed them all though, she reasoned.   
  
"Virginia Weasley, but you can call me Ginny." She said sticking out her hand. She saw the young man's mouth twitch, as if about to make a snide comment, but rather he just smiled.   
  
"Call me Dean." he said simply. Ginny sat down in her old chair, beckoning Dean to sit down in the still empty seat beside her.   
  
"So?" He said. "What are your 'sorrows'?" Ginny giggled for a moment but her face soon turned hard and cold.   
  
"I hope you have all day."   
  
Dean leaned back, thinking of his own troubled life "Make it two, Gin, make it two."   
  
***   
  
  
God, I need to get out of here. If they only knew what I knew. They think I'm stupid. me, Hermione Granger, stupid? Ha! Only Ron knows I'm not crazy, even if he looks at me sad sometimes, like he's seen too many others like me. I wish I could make him feel better, pat him on the back maybe. Kiss him even, kissing him would help. Maybe. But my body doesn't work all right. Like I'm being suppressed maybe.   
  
Here comes Ron. Hi Ron. I say. That comes out right. Hello Hermione. He say. That comes out right. His words always come out right.   
  
He doesn't mind it when I say Ron no more.   
  
I ask him where Harry is. Last time I asked he got all sad. Now he just smiles. He says Harry needed a long sleep. He goes to sleep alot. He never seems to wake up.   
  
Sometimes I want to sleep so bad. They give me all those sedatives. I haven't slept in years.   
  
***   
  
Dean smiled. He liked to smile. He liked to smile when a very pretty girl was sitting by him.   
  
"Let's see, I hate my family." Ginny started, Dean zoned out a bit, thinking of other days. He supposed he didn't listen too much of anything anymore. "I was the youngest, the only girl, sort of forgotten, sort of pushed aside. Then came the war and they all died and all of them get their names inscribed on that not-so-puny memorial. Mum and Dad visit it every day. Life sort of revolves around it. God forbid they remember they still have two kids. Sometimes," She paused for obvious dramatic effect, "Sometimes I wish I died too."   
  
Dean cocked a brow, and he had to resist rolling his eyes. "That's horrible." He said.   
  
"How do you figure? They're all getting this praise. What am I getting? Nothing!"   
  
"They're dead, Ginny. They're never enjoy any of it." Dean said, and Ginny's face crashed into a frown, canyon-like wrinkles indenting into her forehead.   
  
"I know." She said at last, after something of an eerie silence. "Sometimes I just forget. Sometime I don't want to remember."   
  
"Remember what?" Dean said, a bemused expression on his face.   
  
"Remember that they're dead, not coming back, finiso. She sighed. "You know what it is to lose someone close to you, don't you?"   
  
Dean's eyes flickered and Ginny could tell his mind was somewhere else. "Yes, I suppose we've all lost something or someone close to us. Something we've known all our lives. Even if it isn't quite dead."   
  
Ginny didn't like the way he said it.   
  
***   
  
Ron brought me a newspaper today. He knows I like to read, he does. I can still read just sometimes. I haven't lost that yet.   
  
I read it from cover to cover. I liked this editorial best. It was by an Auror and his paranoid wife. Made me laugh, how paranoid they are.   
  
Voldemort hiding in our own Backyard?  
As you may know the Dark Lord is supposedly dead. Supposedly, but no body was ever found, no real proof of anything of the sort. Now that the war is over we tend to be fast to dismiss the possiblity of another revival. As my Grandfather always used to say "Constant Vigilance!". If Voldemort is alive he is likely hiding in the body of someone we may know. An old acquaintance, perhaps. Anyone you know seem very different to you lately? Any former death eater is also a huge suspect. Brothers, cousins, the sane, the insane, even the...dead! Dark wizards have been known to use dead bodies to their advantage. Seeing what appears to be the ghost of an old pal? Beware! Constant Vigilance!   
  
  
  
Hahaha, I laughed. I showed Ron but he don't laugh. He just shakes his head and say he has to go. Hahaha. Besides, everyone knows Harry beat Voldemort back in 7th year....   
  
  
"Ginny!" A voice yelled from behind her. Ginny spun on her heel.   
  
"Yes?" She squinted a bit and soon recognized the figure behind her in the parking lot as Will. Her head perked up in excitement. A handsome man was shouting her name.   
  
"Hello!" He said, a strong Aussie accent striking her ear drums. "Colin's told me you were at Hogwarts same time as Harry Potter."   
  
"Yes?" Ginny said. "What about him?" She tried to hide the disappointment that he wasn't asking her out.   
  
"Well, you knew him better then Colin and I need some information." He grinned as she raised an eyebrow and gave a laugh. "I'm a reporter for a Aussie newspaper, Sydney Seer, you heard of it?"   
  
"Uh, yeah." Ginny lied. "I hear it's good."   
  
He smiled a bit and Ginny couldn't help thinking he had a great smile. Still, the pained look constantly in his eyes scared her a bit. "So, we could discuss it sometime? Over lunch say?" he said and Ginny realized she hadn't been listening.   
  
"Uh, yeah." She said, her mind somewhere else despite the gorgeous specimen in front of her, and he shot her grin.   
  
"Great! See you there!" He said, his white pearls peeking through under his upturned lips.   
  
"It's a date." Ginny muttered under her breath.   
  
***   
  
Dean watched the scene unfolding in front of him, from the "cheery" Ginny! to the muttering of "It's a date." under the pretty redheads breath. He sighed a bit, and squinted with resentment. It was not that he liked Ginny, no redheads didn't do it for him. He just hated when perfect little boys got the girls. He bet he didn't even like Gin (as he had come to call her in his mind). Poor Gin, he would think to himself. Not that he cared. It wasn't like he liked her.   
  
No, there was no girl that could "do it for him" for he had vowed love was for fools. It was almost as foolish as trust.   
Dean had no one to love, no family, no real friends. He longed to tell Gin his story but realized he couldn't, for obvious reasons.   
  
Still, he could never drag her down with his issues. Never could he force this already depressed girl to listen to his rants and raves. Even if he somehow felt the girl with troubled eyes might understand   
***   
  
Ron does not visit me anymore. I miss Ron. It is very lonely without Ron. I am very lonely without Ron. We are all very lonely without Ron.   
  
Today I talked to Ginny. Hello Ginny, I say. Hello Herm, she say. My mouth feels like it filled with cotton.   
  
You look very tired, say Ginny. Thank you, says I.   
  
She tells the doctors they should give me more sedatives.   
  
I hate to sleep.   
  
Sometimes I dream Ron is dying in my arms and I am crying and then Voldemort turns to me and shouts out a curse and I fall and hit my head real hard and when I open my eyes I'm in this room with white walls and then when I really open my eyes I really am there.   
  
Ginny, says I, how is Ron? I dreamt he was dead but I see him a lot so I knows that was a dream.   
  
Ginny shudders. I give her a blanket.   
  
It is very cold here, says me.   
  
I haven't slept in a very long time. If I don't sleep Ron will still be alive, right?   
  
Of course right.   
  
***   
  
George Weasley still had a twinkle in his eyes. Long after everyone else had lost the twinkle in their eyes. Everyone else's had long ago faded to mere nothings. That's what a war does to people.   
  
And so it goes.   
  
George was different. George was happy.   
  
"Hello Ginny!" George shouted every time when he saw his sister. She just grunted.   
  
"Good morning to you too." She said sternly. Then he'd laugh real loud.   
  
Everyone thought he was perfect.   
  
Ginny heard him talking to Fred sometime.   
  
He was as nuts as her.   
  
He still had that twinkle though.... 


End file.
